I called up Lufthansa
Told ‘em we wanted to fly
I called up Lufthansa
Told ‘em we wanted to fly
Me and my two kitties
We wanted to fly
Fly home to Denver
Two tickets I would buy
We’d love to have your business
We’d love to sell you seats
We’d love to have your business
We can sell you two seats
Got room for your two kitties
Just bring em on down
Fly on home to Denver
Two tickets you must buy
She sent me two emails
Everything is fine!
She sent me two emails
Saying we could fly
She promised us passage
Just me and my two cats
Flying home to Denver
No problem just like that
We went down to the airport
Me and my two cats
Five bags and this guitar
Me and my two cats
We got there very early
Long before the flight
Going home to Denver
No problem just like that
I walked up to the counter
And tried to check us in
I walked up to the counter
But they would not check us in
You cannot have two kitties
The agent grimly vowed
We’ve got rules against this
One pet is all you’re allowed
I showed her my two emails
I took her to the Web
I showed Lufthansa’s policy
It’s nothing like she said
She shook her head grimly
She refused to let us fly
We’re got rules against this
One pet is all you’re allowed
I called up customer service
I asked them for their help
They stood behind their agent
They said she had it right
One pet per person only
Our policy is firm
We’re got rules against this
One pet is all you’re allowed
I read them the policy
I read it straight from the Web
There was no such policy there
No rule against two pets
It did not say what she said
No “one pet per person” rule
This is wrong, it is crazy
And also it is cruel
I called up United
“Can you fly us home?”
I called up United
“Will you fly us home?”
Me and my two kitties
Two tickets I did buy
Flying home to Denver
Together we could fly
We had to go to Munich
900 miles away
Me and my two kitties
Two train rides we did take
Five bags and my two kitties
Three days we were delayed
Flying onward to Denver
United took us home
Lufthansa, Lufthansa
How could you be so cruel?
A case of broken promises
Of fake and bogus rules
Your leaders hide in silence
Showing no remorse
You owe me an apology
You owe me so much more
Lufthansa, Lufthansa
How could you be so cruel?
Lufthansa, Lufthansa
How could you be so rude?
Lufthansa, Lufthansa
How could you be so cruel?
Your silence is wicked
And my treatment was really really horrible